Monday, 25 March 2019

9 Most Common Relationship Advice Questions & Answers

Learning from other relationships

Whether you are starting something new or you have been committed for years, the value of other people’s relationship advice questions and their answers is always helpful. Remember that despite the differences in participants, all relationships are more or less similar. Some other couple has faced the challenges you now face. Your relationship highs have been another pair’s good times too. That means that there is a lot to learn.

With this in mind, here are 9 of the most common relationship advice questions and answers.

Question #1: When is the right time to introduce your partner to your friends and family?

Meeting friends and family is a pretty huge milestone in any relationship. It shows that you trust your partner and the stability of your relationship to let other people in. One of the best ways to know you are ready is when you can see a future with your partner. The last thing you want is to waste your beau’s time or to get your friends and family emotionally invested in something you’re not confident in.

Question #2: What is a strong and healthy relationship in the first place?

You probably see a healthy relationship as one where you are totally in synch, never fight and generally have everything going well. That is more like a fictional Hollywood-created relationship than a real-life one.

In reality, a healthy relationship is one where despite all your differences you are willing to work as a team. There is great communication, personal growth and most importantly, healthy fights.

Question #3: Is there a place for gender-based roles in today’s relationships?

Here, it depends on your relationship dynamics. If you are a couple that believes in traditional roles then, by all means, divvy them up that way. If you have a more modern outlook, then you can split roles based on ability and availability. The important thing is to ensure that you are both on board and not feeling in any way oppressed.

Question #4: Is it ok for your partner to have besties from the opposite gender?

Having a partner with close friends of the opposite gender is always a point of contention in relationships. It stems mainly from insecurities and the fear that your partner might be tempted to cheat. It doesn’t matter whether it is physical or emotional.

The answer to this question is multi-part. First of all, it is ok only if your partner is doing a good job of reassuring you. There also needs to be boundaries set between these friends. It is also a good idea to get to know your partner’s friends as a way to get some peace of mind.

Question #5: How do you know when you and your partner are ready for that next step in the relationship?

It could be moving in together, getting engaged, buying property together or even having children. All these major milestones above all else require that you are both on the same page and ready. If there is even a sliver of doubt in you or your partner, then do not force it. You are not ready. It is also important that you both trust each other and have proven to be able to handle responsibilities that come with these relationship upgrades.

Question #6: How do you tell when a relationship is toxic?

The best way to tell is through your gut instinct. Plain and simple. If you do not trust it, then you could always listen to input from friends and family who have observed the relationship dynamic. Finally, red flags including cheating, any form of abuse and poor communication are pretty much neon signs pointing to Toxicity City. Pun very much intended.

Question #7: How much time is too much time together?

Being in a healthy relationship does not mean spending every waking moment of every single day together. If your time with your partner is hindering you from other responsibilities like school or work, then it is too much. If it is stopping you from pursuing hobbies and other interests, then it is too much. And if it is keeping you from family and loved ones, then you need to dial it down.

Question #8: How often do couples with healthy sex lives get intimate?

When it comes to sex, it is more about the quality than the quantity. That means that your bond matters more than how much time you do it. The goal is to make it as intimate as possible and not like a routine chore you need to check off your weekly to-do list. Yep, that was another intentional pun.

Question #9: How soon after starting a relationship is it ok to get intimate?

Now that we are talking about sex let’s tackle another very common related question. How soon is soon enough? The truth here is there is no solid timeline of the ideal time to get intimate after starting a relationship. For some people, it is as soon as they meet while others would prefer to wait until they are married.

What matters most is that you at least get to know and trust the person you are with. That way it is not just a physical experience but also emotional.

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